not sure if this will fly, but i needed a place to empty my thoughts anyway and i admire so many people here for their vulnerability. about a year and a half ago i weighed around 125 at 5’4”, barely eating anything and stats wise seemed alright but i was perpetually weak and struggling. after getting on some antipsychotics and other medications my eating disorder and general psychosis lifted and i gained around 50 pounds, and now i’m covered in stretch marks and i can barely look at myself in a mirror.
i have all the motivation in the world to make changes and then cravings hit and i just have zero willpower over them. doctors have mentioned that it’s likely in large part due to my meds, but i desperately want to drop some weight and finally feel like me again. i read people’s stories here obsessively and yet every day i find myself pounding down sugar and staying lethargic and it’s ultimately starting to loop back into some severe depression.
i know there’s likely not much of an answer beyond get over it, but i was hoping that someone out there may have a similar story and maybe some guidance on how to push through, especially when COVID risk has limited my ability to find fitness help outside of the home.
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source https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/ja564i/fixing_my_mental_health_made_me_gain_weight_now/
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