The past few months my health feels like it has gone down the toilet. I started seeing a cardiologist because I was dizzy and having heart palpitations so I went to the ER and was told I had premature atrial contractions and was dehydrated. My cardiologist says I have high blood pressure and is worried, I'll probably be diagnosed with hypertension later this month and have to start taking medication. I've had GI problems and the blood work done at the ER showed elevated liver enzymes so I saw a gastroenterologist yesterday because of that and those annoying GI problems. I am hoping that the tests she ordered will tell me I have non-alcoholic fatty liver disease because that would be the least serious of all the other problems she told me about but still scares the crap out of me. My mother, my father, and my paternal grandfather all either have or had diabetes, I feel like its only a matter of time until I have it as well and that scares me even more. I am hoping that my high blood pressure and PAC are caused by sleep apnea, I am picking up an at-home test kit on Monday to see if I have that too. I am literally hoping that I routinely stop breathing in the middle of the night because I can get a CPAP to treat that, how screwed up is that?!? That's not something I should be wanting to be diagnosed with. Having to sleep with a mask strapped to my face would be terrible, even if it does give me more energy and fix other problems.
I just had a little girl in October, shes perfect and wonderful and I want to make sure I am around to see her and my older daughter grow up into beautiful wonderful women just like their mother. I want to live to be a grandfather. I hate dreading having to get down on the ground to play with them, I want to be able to run along with them helping steady them as they learn how to ride a bike. I want to go camping and go on all kinds of outdoor adventures and teach them to love the outdoors just like I was taught as a child.
My parents are morbidly obese as well, my mom's knees are shot, and walking is excruciatingly painful for her because all the cartilage has worn away. She had surgery on a knee over 10 years ago and it only made things worse. She had surgery to remove a bunch of extra skin and she almost died because she had a reaction to the synthetic version of morphine they gave her and landed in the ICU for over a week with kidney failure and septic shock back in 2017. I have been following in my parents' footsteps and that terrifies me as well.
No more putting it off, this is not my new years resolution, this is a new life resolution. It just so happens that I reached my tipping point on new years eve.
Tomorrow the fun begins, I'm breaking out MyFitnessPal again. Nothing goes in my mouth unless I can count the calories. If I fail on a day, which I will sometimes the next day I will get back on the wagon so I don't fall all the way off again. I am going to drag my 64oz water bottle with me everywhere I go and make sure I drink 2 of them every day to keep hydrated. I am not going to exercise very much yet, not until I get the green light from my cardiologist, and even then I'll start with a slow, easy walk.
My obesity will control me no longer, this is the phase of my life where I beat it into submission and destroy it forever. I will not stop until I am at a healthy BMI. I cannot risk stopping. I want to know what my body is capable of.
Edit: I'm only in my early 30's. I should not have a cardiologist in my 30s. When I went to an appointment on Christmas Eve I was the youngest in the waiting room, by far. Every other person there was old enough to be my grandparent. I don't belong there.
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/u/ScaredFatless
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